Isaac’s Marriage
Isaac’s Marriage
The Faithful Steward
Now Abraham had grown old, and Yahweh had blessed him in every way. He said to his chief steward, who was responsible for everything he owned, “I would like you to take a solemn oath and swear by Yahweh, the God of the earth and the sky, that you will not arrange a marriage between my son and any Canaanite woman here where I live. Instead, you must go to my homeland and to my people to find a wife for my son Isaac.”
Image by LUMO Project from Free Bible Images
After twelve chapters of God promising to bless Abraham, the narrative affirms that at the age of 140, he was indeed blessed. He had great wealth and placed everything he owned under the authority of an unnamed steward.1 Abraham must have trusted his steward implicitly, since he gave him authority even over his most precious possession, his son Isaac. Arranged marriages were the norm at the time, but it’s surprising that a servant, not Abraham himself, would find a wife for Isaac.
Abraham didn’t want Isaac to marry a Canaanite woman. To find the right wife for Abraham’s heir, the steward would have to travel to Abraham’s homeland in Mesopotamia, a journey that would take about a month each way. Only an Aramean bride from Abraham’s own people would do.2
The story of the steward’s journey revolves around the keyword hesed (“faithfulness,” “devotion”).3 The steward uses the word four times, and the concept permeates the chapter. As in most of Genesis, the main focus is on Yahweh’s faithfulness to his covenant with Abraham, which the steward calls on twice (verses 12 and 14) and praises once (verse 27). But the faithfulness of the steward also shines through. Here is a servant so devoted to his master that he shares his master’s joy.4
To Aram Naharaim
“What if the woman is not willing to return here with me?” the servant asked. “Should I really take your son to the land you left?”
“Under no circumstance will you take my son there! Yahweh, the God of heaven, took me from my father’s household and from the land of my people and swore to give this land to my offspring. He will send his messenger before you to help you find a wife for my son there. But if she is not willing to leave with you, you will be free from this oath. But you must not take my son back there!”
So the servant solemnly swore this oath to his master, Abraham. Then he took ten of his master’s camels and all the best of his master’s wealth and set out for Nahor’s city in Aram Naharaim.
Image by Inbal Malca from Freely Photos
Abraham wanted his steward to swear that he would find Isaac an Aramean wife, but first the steward voiced a valid concern. In the ancient Near East, oaths were made in the name of a deity, who was called upon to punish oath breakers. The steward surely knew how Yahweh avenged even accidental wrongs against Abraham, and he would risk incurring Yahweh’s wrath if he failed.5
Finding a young woman willing to leave her family forever and follow a stranger to a foreign land would be no easy task. To fulfill his oath, the steward would likely have to take Isaac back to live in the land Yahweh had called Abraham to leave. Surely Abraham didn’t want that!
Abraham affirmed that taking Isaac to Aram Naharaim was not an option under any circumstance.6 He had faith that Yahweh would enable his steward to fulfill his oath. It’s unclear whether “his messenger” refers to Yahweh’s messenger or a true angel.7 But either way, the steward would have supernatural guidance on his journey. Still, Abraham addressed his steward’s fears by assuring him that he would not be held responsible if he failed to find a woman who would return with him.
So the steward swore that he would travel to Aram Naharaim to search for a bride for Isaac. He took with him expensive gifts as evidence of Isaac’s wealth and set out for Harran, the city where Abraham had last seen his brother Nahor.
Watering Camels
Outside the city, [Abraham’s steward] had the camels kneel by the well in the evening, when the women come out to draw water. He prayed, “Yahweh, God of my master Abraham, please show your faithfulness to my master by accomplishing this task for me today. Look! I’m standing by the spring, and the women of the city are coming out to draw water. I will say to a girl, ‘Please lower your jar so I may have a drink.’ Let the one who replies ‘Drink, and I will also draw water for your camels’ be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac. This is how I will know that you have shown your faithfulness to my master.”
Image by Herbert Bieser from Pixabay
When Abraham’s steward arrived in Harran, he wasted no time implementing his plan. The best place to encounter the young women of the city was at the well in the morning or evening, when they would come to draw water for their families. The steward had the camels kneel down to rest, but he didn’t give them water. Instead, he prayed they’d serve as a sign indicating the woman Yahweh had chosen for Isaac.
To offer a drink of water to a weary traveler was basic Near Eastern hospitality. The camels served as the real test. Camels are famous for their ability to go long periods of time without water. To compensate, they can drink over thirty gallons at a time.8 Volunteering to single-handedly water ten camels would demonstrate both generous hospitality and a strong work ethic. It was a difficult but fitting test. If such a worthy woman came to the well, the steward would recognize it as Yahweh’s leading.
Rebekah
Even before he finished praying, Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She was the daughter of Bethuel, son of Abraham’s brother Nahor and his wife Milcah. The girl was a very beautiful young virgin. She went down to the spring, filled her jar, and returned. Then the servant ran to meet her. “Please, may I have a sip of the water in your jar?”
“Drink, my lord,” she answered, quickly lowering her jar into her hands so she could give him a drink.
When he had finished drinking, she said, “I will also draw water for your camels until they have drunk their fill.” Then she quickly emptied her jar into the trough and ran back to draw more water from the well. She drew enough to satisfy all his camels. The man silently watched her, wanting to know whether Yahweh had made his journey successful.
When the camels had drunk their fill, the man took out a gold nose ring weighing half a shekel and two gold bracelets weighing ten shekels. “Who is your father?” he asked. “Please tell me whether there is any room in your father’s house for us to stay the night.”
“I’m the daughter of Bethuel, son of Nahor and Milcah,” she answered. “We have plenty of straw and feed and also room for the night.”
Image by todd white from Creation Swap
Before Abraham’s steward finished praying, Rebekah approached the well. Abraham wanted Isaac’s wife to come from his own people, and Rebekah was both the granddaughter of Abraham’s brother Nahor and the great-granddaughter of his brother Haran.9 But the steward didn’t know who she was. She was simply the first young woman he saw, and he ran to ask for some water.
Rebekah exceeded the requirements of the steward’s sign. After allowing the steward to drink from her jar, she quickly emptied the rest of the water into the trough for the camels. Then she ran back and forth between the well and the trough until the camels had finished drinking. The same two Hebrew verbs, mahar (“to hurry”) and ruts (“to run”), describe both Rebekah’s quick actions and Abraham’s rushed meal preparation for his sudden visitors.10 A woman whose extreme generosity matched Abraham’s would make a worthy daughter-in-law indeed!
Meanwhile, the steward could only watch and wait to see if she would finish the task. When she did, he took some valuable jewelry as a gift and asked about her family and if they had room for guests. Only then did he learn how Rebekah was so closely related to Abraham. The steward had found a bride for Isaac, but first he had to ask her father to agree to the marriage.
Even Me!
[Abraham’s steward] bowed low, prostrating himself before Yahweh. “May Yahweh, the God of my master Abraham, be blessed! He has not failed to show true faithfulness to my master. And even me! He has led me straight to the family of my master’s brothers.”
Image by Jeremy Perkins from Freely Photos
Abraham’s steward began his journey afraid of failure. He feared God but had not learned to rely on him as Abraham did.11 As part of Abraham’s household, the steward was a circumcised member of the covenant community and probably already worshiped Yahweh.12 But what did God’s promises mean for someone who was not an offspring of Abraham?
In response to the steward’s fears, Abraham had promised him divine guidance, which the steward called on through his prayer for a sign. When his prayer was answered immediately, he bowed down and praised Yahweh for his faithfulness to Abraham. His praise was mixed with astonished delight that God had answered the prayer of a humble servant. The Hebrew here is emphatic: Me! He led me!
Abraham’s steward serves as an example of how God blesses those who bless Abraham.13 Yahweh answered his prayer and led him to Rebekah. The steward left Canaan to find a wife for Isaac. But along the way, he found something far greater. He found the power of faith in Yahweh.
Laban
[Rebekah] ran to tell her mother’s family everything that happened. Rebekah’s brother, Laban, ran out to meet the man at the spring as soon as he saw the nose ring and the bracelets his sister was wearing and heard Rebekah recount what the man had said to her. He found the man still standing by the spring with the camels.
“Come with me, you who are blessed by Yahweh!” he said. “Why are you still standing outside? I have prepared the house and a place for the camels.” So the man went to their house. After the baggage was unloaded, the camels were given straw and feed. Then the steward and the men with him were given water to wash their feet.
Rebekah told Abraham’s steward that her family had room for guests, but she did not have the authority to invite him to stay. So the steward stayed by the well while she ran home to tell her family. Although Rebekah’s father was alive, he was no longer acting as the head of the household. So Rebekah told her mother and brother about the man at the well.
Laban, Rebekah’s brother, ran back out to formally invite the steward and the others with him to their house. At first glance, Laban seemed to share his sister’s hospitable spirit, providing everything his guests needed to refresh themselves and the camels. But the note that he saw the expensive jewelry the steward had given his sister suggests that Laban’s actions may have been motivated more by greed than by generosity. Was he trying to garner the favor of this wealthy stranger?
This hint about Laban’s true character foreshadows his future mistreatment of Rebekah’s son Jacob.14 For personal gain, he was willing to cheat even his own nephew. In this way, he contrasts sharply with Abraham’s steward. While the steward was blessed because of his faithfulness to Abraham, Laban would lose both his wealth and his daughters because of his unfaithfulness to Jacob.15
The Steward’s Story
When the meal was set out, the steward said, “I will not eat until I have said what I came to say.”
“Please tell us.”
“I’m Abraham’s servant,” he said. “Yahweh has greatly blessed my master, so he has prospered. He has given him flocks, herds, silver, gold, servants, camels, and donkeys. And Sarah, my master’s wife, gave birth to a son although she had grown old. My master has given his son everything he has.
“My master made me swear I would not arrange a marriage between his son and any Canaanite woman in the land where he lives. Instead, he sent me to his father’s household, to his family, to find a wife for his son.
“When I asked my master what I should do if the woman would not return with me, he replied, ‘Yahweh, before whom I walk, will send his messenger with you. He will make your journey successful, helping you find a wife for my son from my family, from my father’s household. You will be free from my curse only when you go to my family. Even if they will not give her to you, you will be free from my curse.’
“Today, when I arrived at the spring, I prayed to Yahweh, the God of my master Abraham, ‘Please make this journey I’m on successful. Look! I’m standing by the spring. When a young woman comes out to draw water, I’ll ask her to please give me a sip of water from her jar. Let the one who offers to both give me a drink and draw water for the camels be the one Yahweh has chosen for my master’s son.’
“I had not yet finished my silent prayer when Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder. She went down to the spring to draw water, and I asked her to please give me a drink. She quickly lowered her jar and said, ‘Drink, and I will also get water for your camels.’ So I drank, and she also got water for the camels.
“I asked her who her father is, and she replied, ‘I’m the daughter of Bethuel, son of Nahor and Milcah.’ Then I put the ring in her nose and the bracelets on her wrists. I bowed low, prostrating myself, and blessed Yahweh, the God of my master Abraham, who had led me on the right path to find the granddaughter of my master’s brother as a wife for his son.
“Now tell me whether you will show true faithfulness to my master. If not, I’ll turn elsewhere.”
Image by Christine Schmidt from Pixabay
Abraham’s steward refused to even eat before he had explained his mission to Rebekah’s family. As he told his story, he masterfully played up three reasons why they should allow Rebekah to marry Isaac: Abraham’s wealth, Yahweh’s revealed will, and their family obligations.
The steward began by describing Abraham’s riches, attested by the camels and gold jewelry they had already seen. He made sure to mention that Isaac was Abraham’s only heir. If Rebekah married Isaac, she would become the matriarch of Abraham’s household and would lack for nothing. Her family could also expect to receive a substantial bride-price.
Next, the steward told the story of his journey, from Abraham sending him to Harran to Yahweh leading him to Rebekah. He detailed his prayer for a sign and how Rebekah fulfilled that sign. She was clearly Yahweh’s choice for Isaac. So if her family refused the marriage, they would be going against God’s will.
Finally, he reminded the family that Abraham was Nahor’s brother. Nahor had fulfilled his obligation to care for his family by marrying his orphaned niece, Milcah.16 Now the steward was calling on Nahor’s son and grandson to do the same. There was no suitable bride for Isaac in Canaan. Would they show “true faithfulness” to Abraham by sending Rebekah?
Dowry and Bride-Price
Laban and Bethuel answered, “Yahweh has decided. There is nothing more for us to say. Here is Rebekah! Take her with you so she may marry your master’s son, just as Yahweh has decreed.”
When Abraham’s servant heard these words, he bowed down before Yahweh. Then he brought out garments and gifts of silver and gold that he gave to Rebekah. He also gave costly gifts to her brother and mother.
Having heard the steward’s story, Rebekah’s family had a difficult decision to make. But the narrative skips over any deliberation and moves straight to the conclusion. As Yahweh had decreed, Rebekah would leave to marry Isaac. Once again, the steward bowed down, giving all the credit for his success to Yahweh. He then distributed costly gifts to Rebekah and her family. These gifts served as Rebekah’s bride-price and part of her dowry.17
The custom of exchanging money and gifts at the time of marriage is still practiced in many cultures. The bride-price, which the groom’s family gives to the bride’s family, should not be thought of as purchasing a wife. It is often considered fair compensation for the loss of labor, since the woman would now work to support the groom’s family. The dowry is usually given to the bride by her own family, but the groom’s family can also contribute. It belongs to the wife, providing a safeguard in case she is widowed or divorced.
The family’s acceptance of these gifts finalized the marriage agreement. Rebekah now belonged to Abraham’s household.
Rebekah’s Blessing
The servant and the men with him ate and drank and then spent the night there. When they awoke the next morning, the servant said, “Allow me to return to my master.”
But her brother and mother replied, “Let the girl stay with us a few more days before she leaves.”
“Don’t detain me. Now that Yahweh has made my journey successful, allow me to return to my master.”
So they suggested, “Let’s call for the girl and ask her opinion.”
They called for Rebekah and asked her, “Will you go with this man?”
“Yes, I’ll go,” she answered.
So they sent off their sister Rebekah with her nurse, Abraham’s servant, and his men. They blessed her, “Our sister, may you have thousands upon thousands of descendants. May your offspring take possession of the cities of any who hate him.” Then Rebekah and her maids left. Riding on the camels, they followed the servant. So the servant left with Rebekah.
Image by Phil Hearing from Unsplash
The next morning, Abraham’s steward asked for permission to leave. He had completed his task and was ready to return home. But Rebekah’s mother and brother wanted her to stay a few more days.18 This was a perfectly reasonable request, especially given the likelihood they would never see Rebekah again. But the steward wanted to leave immediately.
In the end, they let Rebekah decide, and she was also ready to leave. So the family prepared to send her off. As part of her dowry, Rebekah’s family gave her a few servants, including her childhood nurse, Deborah.19 They blessed Rebekah, wishing her many descendants and victory over enemies.
Rebekah’s blessing parallels the blessings promised to Abraham in Genesis 22:17.20 As Isaac’s wife, Rebekah would join Sarah as a mother of the multitude of offspring promised to Abraham.
Isaac’s Comfort
Now Isaac had returned from Beer Lahai Roi, where he was living in the Negev. In the early evening, he went out to the fields to think. When he looked up, he saw the camels approaching. Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac, so she jumped down from the camel. “Who’s this man walking toward us in the field?”
“He’s my master,” replied the servant. So she covered her face with her veil.
Then the servant told Isaac everything that had happened. So Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent. He married Rebekah, and his love for her comforted him after the death of his mother.
Isaac appears in the narrative for the first time in verse 62. He was forty years old at the time and was living in the Negev.21 But he had returned to his father’s camp, likely still in Hebron. The evening the steward returned, Isaac left the camp to take a walk and think.22 The context suggests he may have been thinking about his mother. Sarah had died three years earlier, and Isaac was still grieving.
As the travelers approached, Isaac and Rebekah saw each other at a distance. The steward informed Rebekah that the man she saw was Isaac, so she put on her veil to cover her face. Women didn’t normally wear veils but did so as part of the marriage ceremony.23 In this way, she signaled to Isaac that she was his intended bride.
The steward told Isaac how Yahweh had led him to Rebekah. Then Isaac married Rebekah and gave her Sarah’s tent, befitting the new matriarch. The empty tent must have been a source of sorrow for Isaac. But now it was filled with his beloved wife, who helped him find closure.
- Abraham’s steward is often assumed to be Eliezer of Damascus, Abraham’s heir before the birth of Ishmael. Eliezer was likely a high-ranking servant in Abraham’s household, but the connection with Abraham’s steward over fifty years later remains speculative. See Abram’s Dilemma.
- Genesis 25:20; Deuteronomy 26:5; see Nahor and Milcah.
- See Faithful.
- See Matthew 25:21.
- See Yahweh’s Intervention; Abimelech’s Dream.
- Aram Naharaim means “Aram of two rivers.” It probably refers to the part of Aram between the Tigris and Euphrates, where the city of Harran is located in modern-day Turkey.
- See Yahweh’s Messenger.
- World Atlas, “10 Interesting Facts about Camels,” by Sharon Omondi, July 23, 2019, https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/10-interesting-facts-about-camels.html.
- See Terah’s Family.
- Genesis 18:6–7.
- See To Aram Naharaim.
- See Abram’s Household; Circumcision.
- See Why Israel?
- Genesis 29:1–30; 30:25–36; see Foreshadowing.
- Genesis 31:1, 11–16.
- See Nahor and Milcah.
- Walton, “Genesis,” 102; Walton et al., Bible Background Commentary, Genesis 24:50–59; Wenham, Genesis 16–50, 149–150.
- The Hebrew expression, literally “days or ten,” does not mean they wanted her to stay for a literal ten days. It was a polite way of inviting guests to stay a little longer, without specifying how long.
- See Genesis 35:8.
- See The Promise Expanded.
- Genesis 25:20.
- The meaning of the Hebrew verb suah is uncertain, but it’s probably an archaic form of siah (“to ponder, consider”). See Kidner, Genesis, 159.
- Kidner, Genesis, 160; Walton et al., Bible Background Commentary, Genesis 24:62–66.